Wagging my tail

I once wrote a poem about the job interview process. This was years ago and I was in a group of about 15 or so folks vying for a precious holiday time UPS delivery job. We were all interviewed, one by one, by a supervisor. She would come out into a big waiting room, kind of like at a doctor’s office, and call our names. Then, when it was our turn, we went into her office for the interview.

Over the past several weeks, I have been through my most recent spate of job interviews. One the one hand, it’s like a refreshing rain shower after months of drought. On the other hand… grueling. Torturous. Painful. These days, it’s not just one person who conducts the interview. Usually it’s at least three. I went on an interview about six months ago and walked into a room of seven, armed to the gills with probing questions. Another interview, after being called and told I was on “the short list,” included a panel of interviewers, a roomful of 18 interviewees and a red light/green light lamp (so we’d know when to stop talking).

Needless to say, this is not fun. Especially when you get your hopes up and then get the “after careful review, we’ve decided to offer the job to someone else.” Sigh.

But I WILL say… it’s heartening to get the call. One more chance. And one of these days….

Job Hunting at the Feet of the Queen of Candyland

A roomful of us

trying not to look nervous

so cool we don’t even need deodorant

trying not to look like puppies

waiting to be pet-store bought

our eyes give us away

Body language roars

sighing eye-rubbing

whispering fingers rubbing chins, foreheads

demanding foot tapping

accusing nose picking

arguing hands in and out of pockets like a shakedown

shouting fingers that can’t keep still

shuffling papers, wrestling ties, tapping pencils

we are monkeys searching for nits

waiting

waiting

waiting

for our number to be called

trying not to look desperate

like old whores wearing too much make-up

trying not to notice each other

trying not to feel like sheep in line for slaughter

trying not to feel like cheerleaders at tryout

trying not to be auditioning wanna-bes

door opens

door closes

one out

one in

she is The Queen of Candyland

she comes in and calls names

she is The Queen of Candyland

we worship her

— Jeanne Huff, 1992

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One response to “Wagging my tail

  1. I’ve always hated job interviews…until someone told me that they rather enjoyed them…noting how many times in your life do you get a chance to talk about yourself and people have to pretend to be interested. πŸ˜‰ Enjoyed your post.

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